Priorities


“Hey Bill? You know that psycho killer you testified against?”
“Yeah, what about him?”
“Well he escaped from prison.”
“Oh that’s nice, I heard prison sucks.”
“Uh huh, anyways, there’s a good chance he’s going to come after everyone who put him in prison. Including you.”
“Awesome. We’ve got some extra food left over from that party. We should have one of those “I put you in prison” reunions.”
“I don’t think you understand the seriousness of the situation.”
“Oh I understand perfectly. We have extra food. My friend can help us eat it. What’s so difficult about that?”
“Nothing, look, the cops are going to be parked out front all night. If anything happens, they’ll be able to help us.”
“I bet they’re bored. Do you think they like to drink?”
“What? No! They’re on duty, they’re here to protect you!”
“That sucks. Ah well, I’m going to order a pizza.”
“No! Don’t do that! It’s not safe!”
“Whatever, the phone’s dead anyways. No dial tone.”
*bzzt*
“And now the power’s out.”
“Oh crap!”
“What?”
“The milk in the fridge is going to spoil!”

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